Tapping Therapy (EFT) & Grief

Throughout my book ‘Letters to Matthew – Life After Loss’ I write about various techniques that I use in my private complementary therapy practice. These include a tapping technique, known as the Emotional Freedom Technique’s (EFT) and Matrix Reimprinting.

EFT is a constantly evolving technique of which there are many variations, but it is commonly known as Tapping Therapy.

Essentially these techniques address the entire mind – body system and explore how you process your thoughts, emotions, beliefs and past experiences along with how your body responds.

EFT combines a simple but very effective set of techniques which can release trapped emotions and potentially clear years of emotional baggage. It became an invaluable tool which helped to heal my broken heart after my son Matthew died. I had to be ready to work with this because in the early days when I felt broken by the rawness of grief, I didn’t want to do anything. I wasn’t looking to be mended. I needed to experience my emotions and feel everything that grief had to throw at me. It is important to acknowledge that EFT is a very transformative technique and grief cannot be rushed.

Eventually, when I felt ready, I decided to work on myself using EFT and I became my own grief therapist. I also incorporated Matrix Reimprinting.

Matrix Reimprinting is the evolution of EFT.

The theory behind Matrix Reimprinting is that our unconscious minds are all connected through what we call the Matrix or the Field: an understanding common to many philosophies and cultures. The Matrix is a quantum dimension which holds all our individual selves, past, present and future. We call these selves, ECHOs (Energetic Consciousness Holograms). Once in the Matrix, we are able to communicate with our ECHOs and also other people, including our loved ones who have passed over.

Working with Matrix Reimprinting enabled me to re-visit my son’s cancer journey and interact with my ECHOs. I couldn’t change the past or what happened, but I could change how I perceived any past events, I was then able to resolve the trauma and change my perception of my negative memories.

By connecting and communicating with our ECHOs, we are able to understand the decisions we made at the time and create more resourceful interpretations. This changes how we hold it inside. Together with our ECHO we can generate new pictures and new feelings which create new positive emotions. We can also work with our future ECHOs too.

I was holding onto some very painful memories I had of Matthew regarding his two years of illness, his treatments, experiences and his death. These were memories I couldn’t even talk about without becoming deeply distraught. Matrix Reimprinting allowed me to gently re-visit these dark memories and, in doing that, I connected with my son.

Matthew popped into the Matrix time after time, reassuring me he isn’t suffering now. Each time, I could see his smiling face reminding me that he isn’t in that memory. Each time we connected, he would say, “Come on Mum, you know this stuff. Why are you hanging onto it? Let it go. I’m not there now.” To see him looking so peaceful and happy and to hear his voice gave me enormous comfort.

I healed the most painful memories easily and in such a short amount of time, which to some people, would seem impossible. And by knocking out the negative emotional intensity of the big ones, lots of other painful memories just collapsed too. When I think of those particular memories now, I see Matthew’s smiling face, I hear his voice reassuring me, and I know he is transformed, and so am I.

Imagine you could travel back in time and have a conversation with your younger self. What would you say? The Matrix Reimprinting process allows you to do this. Imagine you could travel into your future too. The Matrix or Field is a place of unlimited potential, as I discovered through my own experiences.

Some people may say I imagined my experiences or that it is just fluffy whoo-hoo nonsense, but it was real for me, and it made a massive difference in how I experienced my grief journey and in the end that’s all that matters. Whatever works for you is the important thing, and everyone has a choice in which path to take. 

Matrix Reimprinting and other types of tapping therapy are not the cure for grief, because there is no cure, but these techniques helped me to heal my heart and I learned how to carry, experience and care for my grief. I became more emotionally resilient, grounded and balanced which created a space for me to feel the connection to Matthew.

Through EFT and Matrix Reimprinting I discovered different perceptions and insights which cultivated a new awareness of just how powerful I AM.

For more information about these incredible techniques check out these links:





“I’m trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You’re the one that has to walk through it.” Morpheus